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Wear the pants for three days, one girl advised as that really gives a good strong smell. I wore the same pair of pants for four days straight at Boomtown last year and I think that’s a smell that whilst entirely different, is as bad as the dodgiest vindaloo poo but then I’m not a panty pervert, so what do I know.

Gives me an excuse to be lazy and not do laundry so that’s a result at any rate. ‘You can charge more for pants that have been pissed in, masturbated in or perioded in’. If I wank in the pants that feels a bit like I’m engaging in a sexual act with this pants perv and to me this is all about exploiting the perv.

The good news is: all the films below are available in English subtitled versions from our friends at CIKO.

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Only one person in the world knows that smell and if that isn’t romantic I don’t know what is.Last year, like every human being in the Netflix having part of the world, I marathoned Orange is the new Black in the space of about three days and a thought came to me. Such as ‘damn if my sexuality wasn’t already confirmed, Ruby Rose just put the final nail in my bisexual coffin’ and ‘I’m a good person, I shouldn’t have to endure a Joe Caputo sex scene’ and ‘why isn’t this show just the Taystee and Poussey comedy hour’.However, the most important thought I had was, ‘say what you want about Piper Chapman, she’s on to something with this panties business’.It would work, largely because misogynistic pervs hate smart women and so we could capitalise on their want to view us sexually.If someone does know how to code and wants to start this up with me, get in touch. There are however many sites on which you can sell dirty underwear.

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